Wwhy Didn't You Love me?
by Eternal Phoenix07
Summary: Eridan just wanted her to love him. He just wanted somebody to care, and notice if he was hurting. But nobody did- and nobody every took the time or effort to try- and it hurt. It hurt so bad. Rated T for language. Humanstuck.


_Hello everyone u.u This is my first time posting anything on this wonderful website, and I really hope that you enjoy my short oneshot. Eridan/Feferi. Tragedy. Oneshot. Please tell me what you think; no flames please!  
~Eternal Pheonix07  
_

* * *

**Why Didn't You Love me?**

"I want to die, Fef." Eridan said his words seeming to ricochet off the walls, rebounding all the way down the hallway, and cutting through Feferi. She stopped- her heart pounding, and her chocolate brown eyes wide- and slowly turned on her heel, facing Eridan.

"W-What?" She asked quietly, her voice unsteady; nervous. "What did you just say?" She said with a panicky laugh. Eridan looked like he always did. He held his tan blazer over his right shoulder, and his white long-sleeved V-neck hugged his slim torso. His khakis were rolled halfway up his shins, and his purple wool scarf was wrapped loosely around his neck. His dark auburn hair was tousled and healthy, shiny and soft looking.

But at the same time he didn't look like him. He lacked that certain bounce; that cockiness that made Eridan, Eridan. His moss green eyes looked sunken, and he looked long faced. His eyes were trained to the ground and he looked so deep in thought, Feferi thought that he would drown.

She slowly made her way towards him, and when she reached him, she reached out and carefully put her hand on his shoulder. She was afraid to touch him. He looked so pale- sick almost- and weary, his freckles standing out more than ever. He looked like he was about to collapse, like he couldn't even hold himself up anymore. She was afraid that if she did touch him, he would break, shatter like glass.

"Eridan…" She whispered, and he looked up at her, his eyes red-rimmed and blood shot. He furrowed his fine eyebrows together, and Feferi watched tears well in his deep sea green eyes.  
"Don't touch me." He whispered so quietly, Feferi didn't hear him.  
"Excuse me?" She asked softly. Suddenly Eridan strikes Feferi's hand, harshly slapping it away- and steps away from her- tears streaming down his face.  
"Don't fucking touch me!" He hollered, making Feferi jump. "I said I wwant to die goddammit! I don't wwant to livve anymore!" He stuttered, his breath hitching, and his voice cracking. Feferi was terrified, she was so scared her mind was blank, and she opened and closed her mouth like a fish out of water; at a loss for words. "It's all your fucking fault!" He screamed, his voice raising an octave.

The back of Feferi's eyes stung, and her eyes were wide, her thin eyebrows furrowed. She felt the burning tears rim her eyes, and spill down her olive cheeks. Eridan was trembling, his fists balled, his knuckles white. His eyes were squeezed shut, tears rapidly falling down his pale cheeks, dripping off his chin. He was biting his lip, something he always did when he was thinking, or when he was scared.

"Eri-"  
"Shut the fuck up Fef!" He screamed, falling to his knees. Feferi gasped, and rushed forward, trying to catch him, but he shoved her away, knocking her down. "You nevver cared! You nevver took the time to ask me wwhat was wrong! You left me for Sol! You wwere my only fucking friend, and you left me!" His words hit her like… like a wave, hard. She couldn't breath and she, for the first time in her life, felt like she was drowning. Her breath came in short gasps, and tears poured down her face.  
"E-Eridan, I tried, I-I tried so hard!" She said as loudly as she could, her voice cracking like glass under a million falling stones.

"No on liked me…N-no one excepted me. I.. Wwhen I met you, Fef, I wwas so happy. " He took a deep shuddered breath, and Feferi slowly crawled towards him. Her long, curly hair fell in face, but she made no move to sweep it out of her way. "I wwas in lovve wwith you Feferi.." Eridan whispered tenuously. "And..And you left me…You left me wwhen I needed you the most." He was sobbing now, bawling, and covering his eyes.

"You….You never listened." She said quietly, chocking on her own sobs as well. Eridan slammed his fists on the ground, and Feferi jumped. "Eridan!"

"You never listened to _me_ goddammit! W-whenever _I_ tried to talk, wwhenever _I_ tried to f-fucking tell you something you wwould yell at me! You wwould tell me that-that I nevver fucking understood!" He hollered, his voice thundering in the empty hallway, bouncing off the deep purple lockers. "But in truth," He roared, his voice breaking, and trembling just as much as his shoulders did. "You nevver fucking lis- listened to me god f-fucking dammit!" Eridan shot up, and took multiple, rapid, steps away from Feferi; his swollen, bloodshot eyes were incredulous. "I kneww you most of my fucking life," He shouted, each word cutting deeper and deeper into Feferi. "And you chose that asshole o-o-over me! If you truly had fucking cared about me, goddammit , you wwould have tried harder! You don't k-knoww wwhat it wwas like for me! You don't knoww howw much I fucking hurt; how much I cried behind closed doors! That's because you didn't care! You didn't fucking care, and neither does a-a-anyone else!" He was hyperventilating, gasping for breath, but he wouldn't let Feferi near him, he wouldn't let her speak. "I feel like I'm trapped in a glass fucking box! I'm s-suffocating, and I scream, and I cry for help and no one tries to help! Ww-when I met you fef I thought you'd be able to b-break the fucking box, that you wwould s-sa-save me!" He stopped for a moment, breathing heavily.

And in that moment, Feferi wished that a teacher would walk down the hallway, that somebody would suddenly come, and help him. She wished that she wasn't bawling her eyes out, helpless on the floor, as one of the people closest to her heart slowly slipped away from her with each word that came out of his mouth. "I nevver let you in b-be-be-because I couldn't! I wwas scared, and I thought that you u-understood that! When you told me you couldn't take- take it anymore…I…I couldn't…didn't want to fucking believe y-you!" He coughed and wobbled on his feet. "You bitch!" He screamed. "You fucking bitch!" He screamed at her and she cringed away from him, wishing that she could melt into the ground, but more than anything wishing that she had tried harder.

Eridan screamed a loud, blood curling scream, and shoved his sleeves up, facing them up, and shoving them in Feferi's face. "Look wwhat I did to myself! Look ww-what you did to me! You and evvery fucking body else did this to me! I thought that I could'vve just been me, my f-fucking self, but I wwas put the fuck down! By all of you!"

"Eridan, no please!" Feferi screamed standing up and grabbing his wrists. They were raw, and red, and Feferi felt bile rise in the back of her throat. He had deep slices up and down his wrist, going up to his elbows. He winced and tried to rip his arms out of her grasp, but she held on like it was the only thing keeping her afloat. "You don't u-understand!" She cried out. "Please! I never, never ever meant to hurt you! I didn't know!"

"That's my fucking point!" He yelled in her face. "You didn't knoww because you d-didn't care enough to tr-tr-try harder! All I fucking wanted wwas for someone to care for me! For some to lovve me! Yet y-you all treat me li-like goddamn trash! Nobody wwould evven care if I-I disappeared! I don't mean to be so fucking mean- I-I didn't mean to hurt anyone or push anyone a-away from me! I j-ju-just couldn't help it!" He ripped his arms away then, and with a loud sob, Feferi threw herself at him, wrapping her arms around him.

She buried her face in his chest, and sobbed, holding onto him for dear life. As if the tide would take him too far out to sea to be saved if she let go. She felt him shuddering, and heard his sobs, and the rapid beat of his heart.

"Get the fuck off me Fef!" He wrenched her off, grabbing her arms with bruising force, and shoving her away from him. "W-wwhy didn't you lovve me Fef?! Wwhy?!" He cried. "Wwhy d-didn't you lovve me?!" And with that, he turned on his heel, looking at her tortured face, her hurt eyes, and truly believed that she didn't care..Because no one cared about him..He wasn't loved, not even close to being liked. He was hated and he was never, and never would be, accepted. He was just pitied, and that's not what he wanted. He sprinted down the hallway, his heavy footsteps bouncing loudly off the walls.

"Eridan! Please come back! Please!" He heard Feferi plead behind him, and he heard her running after her. "Eridan! Eridan stop! Eridan!" She ran after him, screaming, begging for him to come back. She knew she would never see him again if she let him go now, and she ran as fast as she was able, pushing herself to be faster. "PLEASE?!" She screamed, but he was too fast, and he threw open the door and disappeared from her sight. "ERIDAN!" She ran outside, a slight drizzle coming down on her, kissing her skin. She ran, and ran looking for him, but he was gone.

She fell to her knees, scraping the skin on the sprinkled cement, and buried her hand in her face, her ebony hair falling in curtains around her face. "I'm sorry." She sobbed, her voice muffled. "I'm so sorry Eridan! Please don't leave me! Please!?"

He was right, she should've tried harder.. She shouldn't have left him the way that she did. She should've seen how much he was hurting…She should've been more of a friend then she had been.

Eridan was gone for three days; nobody knew where he was. And he had been right. Nobody besides her cared if he was okay, nobody worried if he was safe. When they found him, he had washed up on the bank of the downtown river, by the reservoir. He killed himself…And Feferi knew that it was all..her fault.


End file.
